Double workout day!

Woot woot! I had a great walk with the pup earlier today AND I did another 35 minutes on the treadmill tonight. This rarely happens. I think I can count on one hand the number of days in a year where I actually do more than one workout in a day.

Anyway, just wanted to come online and post about that, 'cause I was feeling proud about it. Oh...and I did a couple sprints at 6.0 on the treadmill tonight! I've never tried to run that fast before, and don't get me wrong, I didn't last very long, but it was kind of exciting. I did 30 second intervals at 6.0 interspersed with my other intervals of jogging at 4.0.

A beautiful fall day :)

Today was one of those beautiful fall days here in...that place I live that's just north of Toronto, Ontario. LOL I'm trying to keep some things private on here.

Anyway, I took advantage of the sunny, cool day with my pup and we went for a trail walk. Because of the high winds yesterday and last night, almost all the trees are now bare! So much for the fall colours! Well, they're still here; they're just all on the ground now. Below are some pics of my pup from our trail walk today:

Autumn is by far my most favourite season. I love the cool weather mixed with a warm sun; I love all the fall colours; and I even love the smell...I know it's probably the smell of decaying leaves and such, but I still find it pleasant.

It was nice to move the workout outside today with my pup. I was able to work up a sweat on the hilly terrain out in the fresh air, without melting like I would in the summer.

Yes...I love the fall :)

Craving BIG TIME!

I don't know what is going on, but I am craving potato chips like it's nobody's business! I mean, to be honest, I am a potato chip addict. I have mixed feelings about there being no potato chips in the house. I'm annoyed on one hand, because I want to eat some chips, but I'm glad on the other hand, because I'm sure I would have eaten the whole bag if there was any in the cupboard. I did not allow myself to go to the corner store to purchase any chips. This option did cross my mind. Instead, I paced back and forth in the kitchen opening and closing cupboards, hoping that potato chips would materialize at some point behind the closed cupboard doors. Does anyone else do that? Just keeping going in and out of the kitchen looking and relooking in the same place for something to eat? I just couldn't see anything in the house that I wanted to eat...again, because there were no chips!

So what did I end up doing? After pouting for a bit, I gave in and sliced up a grapefruit and just a little part-skim mozzarella for a snack. It was tasty...I melted the cheese on a plate, because melted cheese is so much yummier than hard cheese! That helped make my snack a little more appealing. I don't know if that sounds weird to anyone, but yes...I ate melted cheese on a plate. Why do I feel a little embarrassed admitting that?! LOL

So I'm off to floss my teeth and hit the sack before I eat anything else. The snack was good, but I'd still polish off a bag of chips if there was any within reach. I hope this craving doesn't transfer to tomorrow. Sometimes they pass, but other times my cravings go on for days.

Manic Monday

I made it through my first session with a personal trainer this morning. There actually wasn't a whole lot to it. It was mostly paperwork and an assessment of what I could do. I guess the first "real" workout will be on Friday when I see her again. Despite having to wake up at the crack of dawn today, it does feel good to know that I already worked out! That doesn't happen very often. Usually I find myself sitting here in the evening, trying to will myself to go exercise. Not tonight!

Having a blog is kind of like free-associating. I just like to type the first thing that comes to my mind. Right now I'm thinking about clothing and how I am having one of those days where I feel like I have nothing to wear (despite my closet full of clothes). One of the biggest things I hate about being fat is the limited clothing options…especially in Canada! I really miss Lane Bryant and Torrid from when I lived in the USA. I know I can order clothes from these stores online, and I have, but there’s no substitute for actually trying on a big pile of clothing. One store I wish I had plus-size options? Lululemon. I love their yoga workout wear, and long to be able to shop there. Everyone deserves to look cute when they're working out! Even big girls! *sigh* I must be having one of those moments where I feel sorry for myself because I'm fat.

Right now I'd settle for breaking into my box of size 18/20/22 clothing that's sitting down in the basement! I can't wait to lose enough weight and inches to be able to "go shopping" in my basement collection of too-small clothing.

Tomorrow's the first day!

So tomorrow is my first personal training session and I'm totally nervous about it! Part of my nerves is because I'm dreading waking up extra early for the appointment. Seriously...I hate waking up early, but it's the best option. I think I need to just suck it up. Let's hope I don't sleep through my alarm or accidentally turn it off!

I'm feeling a mixture of nerves as well as excitement. I'm excited to shake up my workout and I'm hoping to see some great results with the help of a professional. In the past couple days I've found myself daydreaming about potential results from working with a personal trainer. Admitting that is kind of funny. I don't know if that's normal or kind of sad that I spend my time fantasizing about losing weight! Either way, I've enjoyed it! It's all about positive thinking right? It'll pretty much be 8 weeks when xmas hits, so I'm thinking/hoping/planning/fantasizing about making a dent in my weight and dress size before the new year. It would be nice to be down more than 25 lbs total in 2010. I can't believe I'm thinking about the new year already! Wasn't it just August, like, yesterday???

An update on my goals

So after I posted my last entry, I got to thinking...I wonder how long it would take me to do 500 steps? So I put my laptop aside, set up the stepper, and got to it. Turns out I have a way to go to get under 20 minutes. My time was 33 min. 10 sec. Geeeez! That was longer than I thought it would take me. I got pretty winded a few times and needing to walk around the step with a drink of water for a few seconds. That cost me time, but of course part of the goal would be to be able to go nonstop.

After I got off and told my husband how I did, he wanted to give it a go on his own. So he got to stepping and his time blew mine out of the water! He did 500 steps in 17 min. 23 sec. Of course he was really hoofing it during the last 100. What a show off! It might have been more impressive if he didn't say "I'm going to pass out" as soon as he was done and then almost trip over the step. Okay...it was still impressive. I just can't keep up with my hubby! He's obviously in much better shape than I am, even if I do work out more than he does by miles! It just goes to show how much the extra weight holds me back. Whenever we're on a hike or really long walk with the dog and I get tired and he's still going strong, I always remind him that I'm carrying around almost 80 lbs more than him! That's kind of crazy to think about. And when you put it in that kind of context, I can't help but think how strong I must be, to be able to keep up with him with all that extra weight! That's a good reframe for my extra fat. I like that: that despite being overweight, I'm a physically strong person. I wonder how long hubby would last with an 80 lb weight pack on his back when we go for our hikes? Is it wrong that I would like to put this to the test? ;P

Booked appointment with personal trainer

So I finally made the decision to try out a personal trainer. I booked the first appointment for Monday morning. This is going to be an adjustment for me, as I've booked the sessions for early in the morning before work. I really prefer working out first thing in the morning, but tend to be lazy and opt for sleep when push comes to shove. I'm hoping that having a commitment with another person to work out in the morning will get me to work out more consistently. If it doesn't work out, I'll just have to book the sessions after work instead, but I'm looking forward to having the workouts done and out of the way before the day starts. I'm sure there will be an adjustment period as my body gets used to the new sleeping cycle. I used to always work out first thing in the morning, but sometime over the years that has slipped and I now opt for sleep. Have I mentioned that I'm not a morning person? I absolutely love lying in bed in the morning, cozy under my blankets, dozing between hitting the snooze button. I sleep in way too late on the weekends for someone 30 years old! Of course I don't have kids to wake me and my pup will sleep in his bed for as long as I'm in my bed. I'm so thankful that my dog is as lazy as me in the morning, so I don't get rudely awakened for a morning pee outing...but I digress...

Back to the personal trainer. I'm pretty excited about starting with a new trainer, but I'm also fairly nervous. I'm feeling nervous about how the 1st session will go and I'm worried about being pushed out of my comfort zone (I agree that this is a positive thing, but I'm still nervous about it). I've been thinking about goals for myself. I like working towards goals. Obviously I have weight goals, but I think I should have additional health goals that are above and beyond the focus on the scale. Here's what I have so far:

- To run a 5K.

- To improve my roller skating so that I can tryout for roller derby.

- To be able to do 500 steps in under 20 minutes (I thought of this while watching The Biggest Loser this week. This was what the contestants had to do to compete for a spot on the show. The one contestant who initially did not make it on the show, made this her goal while working out at home. I saw that and wondered...can I do that? I'm guessing probably not, so why not make that a goal? They used a step aerobics stepper with two risers and I have that equipment in my basement.)

- To be able to do 20 "real" push-ups.

That's all I have for now, but it's definitely a fluid list that will grow in time.

A warm and fuzzy for the day

I stumbled across a new blog tonight (who knows how these discoveries happen in cyberspace) and read a quote that made me all warm and fuzzy:

"If you run, you are a runner. It doesn't matter how fast or how far. It doesn't matter if today is your first day or if you've been running for twenty years. There is no test to pass, no license to earn, no membership card to get. You just run." -John Bingham

I love this quote! I read it, sat with it for a moment, and a smile crossed my face. It's simple and basic and true. I did a quick google to find out who this insightful John Bingham is and came across this website:

http://www.johnbingham.com/penguin.html

I think I'm a penguin...or at least I want to be a penguin...or I would be if I ran a race! I'm still holding onto my goal of running a 5K and once my knee heals up completely I'm going to work towards running one in the spring. I really hate to set goals and not meet them, so I was feeling pretty disappointed about being sidelined early in September, but I know I'll get there.

My latest 5K time...

...is nothing to brag about! LOL

I jogged/walked a 5K today for the first time since my knee injury and I had a time of 57 minutes. I was feeling pretty good about that and worked up a fantastic sweat, but then I came online and saw that 57 minutes is a really slooooooooow time for a 5K. In all honesty though, I'm absolutely fine with that. I'm pleased because I know I will improve that time, and I actually had a much worse time the first time I attempted a 5K (I walked most of it). I'm glad I got a good workout in today, because I have been missing my workouts over the past month and a half. Thankfully my knee held up perfectly for that hour long workout. It was a little stiff afterwards, but I did some stretching and it feels fine right now.

At the farmer's market this morning I picked up some brussel sprouts (despite my husband's protests). Now this is a vegetable of which I have nothing but bad memories. I don't ever remember being able to choke them down as a kid, and I honestly cannot remember the last time I consumed a brussel sprout. That being said, I'm always looking to introduce new fruits and veggies into my life. So I guess I'm willing to forgive and forget our sorted past together and give brussel sprouts another chance. I've been researching online some possible recipes to try, so I'm hoping this new veggie will work out. They're so good for you, so I'd really like to be able to eat them in an enjoyable way. It's weird because I can't even remember how they taste; I just remember I really didn't like them.

As for tonight, I roasted some broccoli for the first time. I usually steam my broccoli, but I've roasted many other veggies. Veggies tossed with a little olive oil and garlic...mmmm...so good. I don't know why I haven't thought to roast broccoli before, because it was DELISH cooked that way! That'll be a repeat dish for sure!

Mulling it over...

In the past couple weeks I've been mulling over whether or not I should hire a personal trainer. I know that I would really like a personal trainer to assist with my workouts, but I'm just not sure I want to part with my money! LOL How bad is that? Loss of cash aside, I'm seriously considering it.

I had a personal trainer over a year ago, and I worked out with her for over a year, but I barely saw any results. It was kind of disappointing in the end. I don't think that she challenged me enough and I got bored. The only reason I kept up with working out with her as long as I did was because I wasn't really working out any other time. I kind of felt as though if I stopped seeing her I would stop working out. And basically that's what happened once I stopped seeing her. Obviously I would be looking elsewhere. I now feel like I know more about what I want out of a trainer and am able to ask for it.

Anyone else out there use a trainer?

Finding a balance.

I feel like such a bad blogger. I’ve been so neglectful in posting any updates. It’s been brutal because I’ve been thinking about wanting to post almost every day, but I just haven’t had the time. Correction. When I had spare time lately, I opted to lie on the couch instead. I don’t know what’s going on lately, but I’ve been feeling so tired and worn out. I’m thinking it’s because of my hectic schedule and all this stress that’s been following me around. I really despise feeling like this, because I end up sacrificing the all important self-care time for myself, which includes making time to exercise, among other things. It really is a shameful thing for me to neglect my issues of self-care, especially given what I do for a living. I don’t think I’ve actually shared what my job is…I've always been wary of sharing personal information on the internet. I know this statement may seem like an oxymoron, given how I share my personal thoughts and feelings on the internet, but you know, there's an anonymity to it and sharing what I do for a living feels like I’m pulling back the curtain a little bit. Nevertheless, I feel like it’s time to share what I do, as I’ve naturally come to this topic. Anyway, for anyone who even cares, I'm a psychologist. A clinical psychologist to be exact. So I guess what I’m saying is, I should know better. I should know better about the importance of taking time for myself to address the important issues of self-care. I should know better about maintaining a balance in my life so that I can make sure to fit in the truly important things in life. The things that nurture me and help me feel healthy, content, and contribute to my personal growth. Needless to say, I’ve been neglecting these very things, and as a result, I’m feeling worn out, drained, anxious, and not very content lately. So there you have it. I’m in a funk.

The good news is that I recognize my mistakes and have been starting to make some changes to nurture myself a little more. One step in the right direction was taking this past weekend off. Even though I had (and still have) several reports that needed writing, I gave myself permission to enjoy Thanksgiving weekend. (That’s Canadian Thanksgiving for all you Americans!) I left all my work at home and hit the road to head up north with my hubby and pets to have a good old-fashioned Thanksgiving weekend with the family. Thanksgiving in the north was a beautiful sight. I love taking in all the fall colours. Autumn is my absolute favourite season. I took full advantage of this weekend by sleeping in, playing poker with friends, watching movies, and just plain relaxing. It was a great weekend, and even though I ate my fill of the Thanksgiving feast, let it be known that my pup and I went for a hike every day we were up north. I hiked with my husband, brother, and sister-in-law, plus our pups. They were semi-leisurely hikes, but I certainly worked up a sweat and found myself huffing and puffing a few times. We went for 1.5 hours each day. Some parts of the trail required cautious manoeuvring up and down rocks or steep staircases, but it was a lot of fun and definitely a great workout. Plus the waterfall and river along the trail made for some beautiful sights, especially with all the fall colours out right now. Here is the trail we walked:

http://www.ontariotrails.on.ca/trails-a-z/wilsons-falls-trail/

The good news is that my knee held up! It’s still sore to the touch, and I’m still going to physiotherapy twice a week, but I’m able to move around on it without any issues. I don’t think I can use it as an excuse not to exercise anymore!